Gratitude

Drawn out goodbyes are what I do best...

but I couldn't help but also balloon with gratitude as I left New York City last week. And although I have teeter-tottered these last few weeks, with everything from being with loved ones to hearing of the slaughter of nine black people by a young white boy in South Carolina, I have settled down and anchored myself to the earth to reflect, think, pray, and collect all of myself as I head a bit West to Minneapolis.

On the racist slaughter

I have few words. How will we sew the cuts in our souls if they are repeatedly ripped open? As a new older friend relayed the news (I had not heard of anything in Pine Bush, NY while I was at the Wake Up Retreat) I felt my heart slip to the floor. 

I am trying to be with all of those harmed, especially those sitting in the presence of such hate and sorrow and the family members of those murdered. I am trying to be with my communities instead of in despair. My mind is burned with the words of John Lewis' commencement speech from a few weeks ago: 'Now is the time to get into trouble, good trouble, necessary trouble.' And I've been looking for trouble. But perhaps, as I was reminded this past week at Blue Cliff Monastery, I don't need to look. I must only do what is necessary and hold fast to strong values of peace and love while continuing to cultivate great compassion. Life is here and now. 

On Reverend Charles Moore, the Pastor who self-immolated 

He felt it was a necessary deed and who can call him crazy? When we look at the state of our nation; all of the harm, the systemic oppression, the vast inequity, how do we find peace within chaos? 

I hope it brought the right attention to suffering and that his message to the church will be received. 

How do we find peace within chaos?

My new teacher has reminded me, “The seed of suffering in you may be strong, but don't wait until you have no more suffering before allowing yourself to be happy.” ― Thích Nhất Hạnh

As I went to pick up my dog this morning and was driving through Wisconsin countryside, life presented this.  You know, just a little Social Experiment, and hope, and godly sounds, and life, and breath. Everyday is a miracle.  I see that.